My running journal

I've started keeping a journal on a private forum, but I've decided that I may as well make this public.

I'm gonna be honest - I am a stupendously lazy person. Tie that together with a familial history of diet related diabetes, hypertension, and central obesity, and I need to do something.

For a bunch of other reasons as well, I have decided that I need to try running the Portland Marathon, this year.

So, I am slowly trying to overcome inertia. I've been trying to take small steps in this - very often people set a lofty goal, and start really strong, only to find that they run out of steam right after they start. Just like running in a long distance race - it is very easy to get swept up in the excitement, and allow it to carry you along for a couple of miles - and then the excitement wears off, and you are left to your own devices. And for alot of people, myself included, this is where your excitement and drive tapers, wanes, and flickers.

So, small steps - easily achievable, measurable goals.

At the beginning of the year I thought about what is going on in my life. I had a couple of good talks with some friends, and expressed a bunch of my frustrations. A great deal of my static inertia is self imposed - mild depression related to personal circumstances. And the depression and frustration, in this case, comes out of a sense that no matter what I do, the central things causing me frustration will not change. Which, in part, is true - as my circumstances include other people who are dealing with their own problems. Specifically, my mother had to move in with me. Details aside, single men in their early 30s should not be living with their mothers (even if it technically is the other way around).

I allowed myself to descend into a funk over the past year because of this. There is little that I can do to change the situation, as the other person involved in this has to be the one to initiate the change.
But what I can do is try and and gain some semblance of personal achievement. Small steps.

In order to get out of this funk, I needed to stop hibernating. So the first goal was to wake up before 730am. I set my alarm to 630, and did that for a week. Nothing more than waking up before 730am. I did that for a week, and then added another component. Be in the office (I am self employed) by 8, and be ready to teach a class (Qi Gong).

So I did this for two weeks. Waking up and getting out of bed by 730, and getting to the office by 8. In order to complete my morning routine before getting to the office, I needed to wake up earlier. The drive to the office, without traffic, takes 15 minutes. I stop at a local coffee shop to pick up some coffee and a bagel - factors in another 5-10 minutes - etc. So in order to make it to the office by 8, unstressed by rushing to complete my morning routine, I need to be out the door by 730. So I started waking up at 7.

I've managed to do this since the beginning of the year. This week, I added in running. Since it has been at least a year and a half since I have run any further than a block, I knew I had to start slow. Previous attempts at "getting serious" have resulted in mild injury and an increase in personal inertia - reinforcement that I hate running, it hurts, and I get no joy from it. That needed to change. So instead of going out of the gate like a shot, I am starting slowly, and going very, very short distances.

I started this monday - was up and out of bed by 630, and ran a grand total of just a couple of feet over a mile, at a very slow pace of around 10 minutes. And when I got home I was winded, slightly dizzy, and cold (cause it is cold right now). Feet hurt, legs hurt, etc., etc.

Tuesday morning I woke up around 615, and did the loop in reverse. Didn't keep track of the time, but I pretty much feel the same way at the end of the run.

Wednesday was a rest day. While I could try and be gung-ho and run every weekday, I know from experience that this won't happen, and that pushing hard this early is asking for a real injury. You push to hard and you stymie your goal. So I slept in til 7, and did the rest of my routine.

Today I woke up at 6am, and did another mile. I tried not to time it, but I think I probably did it in under 10 minutes. I know that the last half mile I started picking up the pace. It was cold and very windy this morning.

Tomorrow I will run another mile. Next week, I will increase the mileage to two miles in the morning. Etc., Etc.,

I am going to try and keep this going. Small, attainable and measurable goals.

I hope to remember to post my mileage here every day until the marathon.